22 Mar 2020
Happy Mothering Sunday: Mothers Give and Sustain Life!
Owing to the ongoing global health crisis, I awoke this morning to a heightened sense of self awareness, and received a deeper spiritual revelation. As I opened the cards and gifts from my two young children, I realised how incredibly privileged I am, and how many mothers around the world aren’t.
In these uncertain times, this day means a lot to me, but if I’m being honest, over the years, the day has lost its significance and dare I say, I took it for granted!
The sense of celebration seemed to diminish and was replaced by duty. For example, my husband once bought me a scented candle, inscribed with the words ‘mothers are angels in training ‘. At the time, I read it and thought it was a beautiful sentiment. Now, I think, when will our training be over? When do we qualify?
We don’t! Being a mother is a vocation, a career and a life long profession – that’s why we never have time off, we clock in at work and clock in again at home. We nurture our babies in the womb, during their infancy and childhood, through the growing pains of adolescence, until they leave the nest. But our work is never done and our certificate of completion a fallacy. We may graduate at each year of their lives, but we are always learning – about them and ourselves.
Motherhood for me is a state of being, and it’s much more than being a ‘female’ parent. Let’s do away with convention and ridged definitions. We not only give life we sustain it. Many of us mother those in our inner circle. We nurture, love, show generosity, are considerate, wise, educate, are altruistic and relentless in our pursuit to pour our entire beings into others, with little recognition, reward or reciprocity.
It’s too big, this job of being a MOM. Let’s be honest, we are still working out our own issues, never mind tackling all the panic and manic episodes experienced by our children, partners, friends and family members. But you know what, its okay to deal with the present drama, whilst we heal our past afflictions – the two dichotomies can co-exist, we just need to be careful not to project the traumas of our early years, onto our children, or continue to repeat unhealthy patterns of behaviour.
We can all attest to the fact that many mothers are under valued, never made to feel special, never esteemed, rarely championed or affirmed. Barring the unconditional love from our kids, many are conditioned to maintain acts of service, prioritising the needs of others, neglecting themselves. Self-care an after thought.
Motherhood is also not a right of passage for everyone. So, as you exchange words of thanks and gifts of appreciation today, be mindful and more culturally cognisant and sensitive towards those women challenged by infertility or still grieving the loss of a child. To those without biological children yet, you have a God-given ability to comfort, nurture and create. You have permission to use these abilities daily.
To all mothers, whether you birthed, adopted, fostered, or are a stepmother. I see your tireless work, I see your tears, your sleepless nights, I see the times you doubt your worth, denied your beauty and denigrated your accomplishments – adjust your crown and know that you are regal and majestic.
I also want to send a virtual hug and commend all key worker mothers on the front line today, who make an enormous contribution to society – taking orders in our stores, swiping groceries at the supermarket, cleaning and sanitising our offices and institutions, caring for the sick in our hospitals and looking after our frail relatives in care homes – I am deeply indebted and grateful for your service, dedication and resilience.
Whether you believe Angel’s are celestial beings or walk amongst us, show the mother figure in your life the heavenly praise she is due, let her every step and dream be cushioned in clouds of love and self-belief, and let her know that she is not only a queen, but reigns supreme in your heart.
Happy Mothers Day to you all.